1. Don’t transfer
Transferring is probably my one and only regret in life (I don’t really agree with having regrets). But I was young, naive, depressed, and the least like myself I had ever been. I was away at Temple University for my first semester of college. It had been my dream school and I could not wait to be in Philly. But nothing was like I imagined – I didn’t make any friends, I didn’t join any clubs because I couldn’t afford the dues, I couldn’t get a job. As much as I loved my classes, I just didn’t feel like myself. I would go all day without speaking to a single person. THAT IS SO UNLIKE ME. Most people tell me I never shut up. Instead of sticking it out, I transferred back home after my first semester. I ended up attending two more schools and changing my major three more times. Looking back, I wish I had never left Temple. I wish I made the best of my time there and spread my wings like I usually do. It was not my first time being the new girl so I don’t really know why I couldn’t adjust. But after graduating from UConn three years later with a Comm degree and realizing there are absolutely no jobs in the middle of Connecticut, I wish I’d never transferred out of a city where opportunities are endless and the culture is incomparable.
2. You’re not going to marry him
I hate to admit it but it is quite possible that one of my reasons for being so miserable at Temple was because of the long distance relationship I was in. We were seven hours apart from each other and it was really hard (mainly because I was borderline depressed and he was having the time of his life like I should have been doing). But I was young and I was in love and he was the most important thing to me. I absolutely do not regret being with him or any of my time with him but if I could do it differently, I would not have gone to college in a relationship. In no way did he hold me back, but I think in a way I held myself back because I did not want to experience new things without him. Our relationship was never going to be forever and I wish I had admitted that to myself back then.
3. Keep your friends
I always had a lot of friends. Making friends was never an issue for me (keeping them… well that’s a different story). However, senior year of high school I just remember being so tired of everyone and all the drama. I remember being so wrapped up in the idea of college and the next chapter that I was forgetting about all the people who had been a part of my book the whole time. Coming back after that semester at Temple was so challenging because I was no longer friends with anyone from high school. I had pushed them all away without even realizing it. I could have kept in touch with them, asked them how they were doing, visited them at their schools. Maybe it would not have made a difference now, but it would have made a difference then. It is important to tell the people in your life how much they mean to you and how much you appreciate your relationship.
4. You’re not fat
HAHAHHA you know how people say, “Wow, I wish I was the size I was when I first thought I was fat”? Well, I’ve never heard anything truer. In high school, especially senior year, I thought I was so heavy and so ugly. Looking back, I was HOT. I was the smallest I had ever been and fitting into sizes I never thought I’d fit into. I wish I could be that size again (if I didn’t love food so much) and actually appreciate my body and how I looked. It is crazy to think I wasn’t even aware of how good I looked because all the girls around me were still way smaller. The things I would do to look like 18-year-old me…
Four things I would tell my 18-year-old self
1. Don’t transfer